on looking professional with a certain body shape

shelby spees's photo
shelby spees
·Sep 4, 2020·

2 min read

(This was originally a twitter thread. I've reformatted and slightly edited the thread for readability.)

tw // body image , weight loss , weight gain , eating disorder , ed

I've hesitated to talk about boob problems on here for obvious reasons but like, these are real issues. And asshole dudes with arbitrary standards can impact our careers. Clothes aren't trivial unless you physically fit the mold.

Having worked in a stodgy corporate environment, I'm intimately familiar with the quadruple fucking bind of trying to look put together and professional when nothing fit right and I didn't have the money/time/energy/executive function to get things tailored.
All the while trying to do my actual job and feeling ridiculous for having to spend so much time thinking about what I'm gonna wear to give this briefing.

Planning my outfit a week in advance but then on the day of I'll end up changing 3-5 more times because what I tried on the week before is all wrong now because:

  • too tight
  • too frumpy
  • colors are wrong
  • fabric looks cheap
  • not professional enough

I wonder how many straight-sized cishet men have cried over their outfit (or hair, or makeup) on the day of a big important presentation.

I've fluctuated over this ~40lb range my whole adult life. I mostly look fine. I've learned how to buy casual clothes that adjust to my rapid fluctuations. Hit a low in January 2019, back at the top in June 2020.

When I talk about losing weight, the main reasons are that

  • running is way more comfortable with less body fat (not just the boobs either)
  • clothes hang better and feel more comfortable when I'm smaller

Oof, don't even get me started on the combined sensory overload and emotional gut-punch of a favorite article of clothing feeling wrong all of a sudden because I gained weight.

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